Pictures and Stuff

My Dearest Junebug,

Do I look old and tired to you. Do you see a man who is just worn down, beat up and lost or do you see the fire and flames lurking behind those eyes.

Do you recognize the guy you once knew and see pieces of the man I am.

Does that photo make you sigh, wonder and wish or make you wonder what the hell you were thinking.

Maybe it is all of the above or none of them. At the moment it doesn't much matter and I am good with that. Got stuff I am working on and I see the progress that I keep talking about continuing.

That new blog is working. People are finding me, businesses are finding me. I am making changes and making magic. I am making things happen, albeit slower than I want to.

But that is ok because this is sort of like turning a big freaking boat around. No brakes on a boat, no easy way to just drop anchor and spin. So it takes time to make the stop and spin around to face the appropriate direction.

There are times when it frustrates me and times when I am a bit scared, but damn woman, I feel alive. I feel like I am really heading towards the place I want to be. That impatient part of me gets a bit crazy with this because I want to know what the future holds, I want to see it today.

But I can't see through the fucking fog so all I can do is just keep sailing and adjust as I go. Part of me loves that because it is one big adventure and part of me says WTF John, what are you doing and where are you going.

Usual battle between heart and head but man life is sweet and I just know it is going to work because I am the captain of this ship and my damn destiny.

Bet you wish I was around to give you a big hug and bounce you on my lap. Hee hee, that red face of yours is cute...sometimes. ;)

Time to run.

ML