Hi baby,
Been quite a busy day. Things appear to be progressing in a few areas but not as fast as I would like. Still there is progress and that is worth celebrating.
Looked at one of your recent photos and smiled. You are not just sexy, but beautiful. Sometimes I look at you and think about how I could make love to you for a thousand years and never get tired of you.
I probably told you this but last year when I was at your house you bent over and it took great restraint not to grab your hips and take you. Might have been hard to explain to a few people. Reminds me of the 'old days' when we would talk about how much sex we would have.
I remember how you told me you would never say no and that I could never keep up with you. I still look forward to having significant time with you so that I can work on that. Hard to say it is true if we don't test it out.
I know you believe in science and proper lap experiments. Well my sweet love we need to set aside time to conduct our own experiment. You give your body to me and I'll make it sing. Man oh man, I am...
Anyway you are my best friend and confidant. I love you very much and not just because you swallow. ;)
I want to take care of you and make you smile.
Visibility
Love Of My Life
Dear June,
I stumbled across something online the other day that said something about people having multiple lives. They weren't talking about Karma or any sort of supernatural thing. It was more about figuring out who we are and what we want.
Something along the lines of needing to live a bit before you can really figure those things out. It got me thinking about that whole 'love of my life' thing. I don't know that I remember anyone ever saying it or talking about it before I heard you use it.
That is neither here nor there but I was sort of playing around with how it might apply to multiple lives in this context. Is is something that should apply to your entire life. Should we look at it as being one person or should there be multiple people.
We loved other people before we found each other. Might have even thought they were supposed to be that 'love of my life' person and then learned otherwise.
In some ways it doesn't matter. I am just sort of thinking out loud. But what I am certain of is that I have lived and loved enough to have a pretty damn good idea about the whole thing. And I am still convinced we fill the empty places in each other and that there is a special match.
I really do believe the connection is as strong as ever and that it is not the kind of thing that dies. I am convinced if there was no contact at all it would hurt us.
Not saying this to try and convince you of anything nor am I asking you to do anything. Just sharing a few thoughts. That is another one of our strengths, the willingness to speak our minds and be frank. When I close my eyes I see you.
You are still my girl.
I stumbled across something online the other day that said something about people having multiple lives. They weren't talking about Karma or any sort of supernatural thing. It was more about figuring out who we are and what we want.
Something along the lines of needing to live a bit before you can really figure those things out. It got me thinking about that whole 'love of my life' thing. I don't know that I remember anyone ever saying it or talking about it before I heard you use it.
That is neither here nor there but I was sort of playing around with how it might apply to multiple lives in this context. Is is something that should apply to your entire life. Should we look at it as being one person or should there be multiple people.
We loved other people before we found each other. Might have even thought they were supposed to be that 'love of my life' person and then learned otherwise.
In some ways it doesn't matter. I am just sort of thinking out loud. But what I am certain of is that I have lived and loved enough to have a pretty damn good idea about the whole thing. And I am still convinced we fill the empty places in each other and that there is a special match.
I really do believe the connection is as strong as ever and that it is not the kind of thing that dies. I am convinced if there was no contact at all it would hurt us.
Not saying this to try and convince you of anything nor am I asking you to do anything. Just sharing a few thoughts. That is another one of our strengths, the willingness to speak our minds and be frank. When I close my eyes I see you.
You are still my girl.
Hit and Run
Exhausted. You got here before I could update but here is a quick one for you.
Do you know this song?
or this one?
Do you know this song?
Visitors
Hi Juneleh,
Looks like we have had some visitors here. Someone has been digging through the archives a bit, Not sure what they are looking for but that is ok. Haven't decided if I feel like telling them about your sweet lips and how much I like kissing them.
Could be more fun to tell them how you can't keep your hands off me. They might like to know you kissed me first.
Anyway been a crazy-busy day here. More activity leading to who knows where. Got new stuff I am waiting to hear back on. Part of me is excited because so much is happening but most of me wishes it was settled. Would write more but got a couple of deadlines to hit.
Looks like we have had some visitors here. Someone has been digging through the archives a bit, Not sure what they are looking for but that is ok. Haven't decided if I feel like telling them about your sweet lips and how much I like kissing them.
Could be more fun to tell them how you can't keep your hands off me. They might like to know you kissed me first.
Anyway been a crazy-busy day here. More activity leading to who knows where. Got new stuff I am waiting to hear back on. Part of me is excited because so much is happening but most of me wishes it was settled. Would write more but got a couple of deadlines to hit.
Some Odds and Ends
Dear Juneleh,
Bells are going off in my head. It doesn't happen every day but every time it does I am certain you are thinking about me. I always remember how you told me no one could take better care of me. Do you still believe that?
I am certain that no one could take better care of you than me. That is 'cuz I think we are still best friends. We are sometimes grumpy people but since we can spend huge amounts of time together and not be bothered I see it as being a fundamental part of what makes us work.
Ask me to explain it and I'll say we just understand each other and more importantly accept the good with the bad, the loving with the annoying. Think about all the time we spent together and tell me about an occasion where an hour didn't feel like a minute. Because I am who I am I'll ask what would happen if we had unlimited time together and hypothesize it will have an impact but I don't see it in negative terms.
That is because we have lived and loved enough to appreciate life. That provides perspective and understanding that you can't get without going through what we have.
Every time I have kissed you I have seen you smile. There is a light in your eyes that lights up a room. I love that. Every time the bells go off in my head and I feel you it reminds me that only a fool would let go of your hand or ignore the call.
I love you baby. I just fucking love you and I don't care if I have to wait a while to say it in person because you are worth it.
Sooner or later you'll look into my eyes again while I say it. Sooner or later I'll make love to you again because we are meant to have these moments. Never think you are less than you are because you have the sort of raw beauty that can't be disguised, purchased or fabricated.
You simply are.
Bells are going off in my head. It doesn't happen every day but every time it does I am certain you are thinking about me. I always remember how you told me no one could take better care of me. Do you still believe that?
I am certain that no one could take better care of you than me. That is 'cuz I think we are still best friends. We are sometimes grumpy people but since we can spend huge amounts of time together and not be bothered I see it as being a fundamental part of what makes us work.
Ask me to explain it and I'll say we just understand each other and more importantly accept the good with the bad, the loving with the annoying. Think about all the time we spent together and tell me about an occasion where an hour didn't feel like a minute. Because I am who I am I'll ask what would happen if we had unlimited time together and hypothesize it will have an impact but I don't see it in negative terms.
That is because we have lived and loved enough to appreciate life. That provides perspective and understanding that you can't get without going through what we have.
Every time I have kissed you I have seen you smile. There is a light in your eyes that lights up a room. I love that. Every time the bells go off in my head and I feel you it reminds me that only a fool would let go of your hand or ignore the call.
I love you baby. I just fucking love you and I don't care if I have to wait a while to say it in person because you are worth it.
Sooner or later you'll look into my eyes again while I say it. Sooner or later I'll make love to you again because we are meant to have these moments. Never think you are less than you are because you have the sort of raw beauty that can't be disguised, purchased or fabricated.
You simply are.
And Here We Are
I don't know how often you are reading or not reading the blog. Nothing is showing up in stats. Believe it or not I don't check as frequently as you might think. But I always like seeing you there. You are my favorite person to write for.
The more time goes by and the more I see the more importance I place on trying to spend time with the people we love and care about most. I suppose in a couple of months I am going to experience what you went through last year.
I'll be standing there on the outside feeling like I am missing out on the celebration. It is ok, It is not hard to understand how or why things are as they are now. But it doesn't mean I am not interested in being part of it all.
I figure it is about taking one step at a time. This is how it is now. Might not be like this later on, no way to tell for certain.Just have to play it all out and see where it goes.Anyway dear Juneleh, you warm my heart and that is part of why I want to spend time with you.
Of course there is that other piece that wants to tear your clothes off and have my way with you, but we are not discussing that now. Hope to have news to share real soon. More stuff came through this afternoon, but nothing I want to mention yet. Don't want to jinx things.
MLBF
The more time goes by and the more I see the more importance I place on trying to spend time with the people we love and care about most. I suppose in a couple of months I am going to experience what you went through last year.
I'll be standing there on the outside feeling like I am missing out on the celebration. It is ok, It is not hard to understand how or why things are as they are now. But it doesn't mean I am not interested in being part of it all.
I figure it is about taking one step at a time. This is how it is now. Might not be like this later on, no way to tell for certain.Just have to play it all out and see where it goes.Anyway dear Juneleh, you warm my heart and that is part of why I want to spend time with you.
Of course there is that other piece that wants to tear your clothes off and have my way with you, but we are not discussing that now. Hope to have news to share real soon. More stuff came through this afternoon, but nothing I want to mention yet. Don't want to jinx things.
MLBF
Things are Flying
Dear Sweet Juneleh,
Baby, been a crazy week or so here. Had lots of calls and emails about potential opportunities. Had one fall through that I was really excited about but sometimes that is how it goes. With some luck one of these will fall into place and Ill be moving in the right direction again.
Damn, hate all this chaos. I miss you woman.
Baby, been a crazy week or so here. Had lots of calls and emails about potential opportunities. Had one fall through that I was really excited about but sometimes that is how it goes. With some luck one of these will fall into place and Ill be moving in the right direction again.
Damn, hate all this chaos. I miss you woman.
Longer Letters
Dear June,
I suppose you can consider this one of those notes where I don't hold back and just let go. One of those moments where I don't try to protect your heart or mine, where I just write and rely upon faith. Might sound ridiculous to you but sometimes it is all I have got.
Baby, sometimes I wonder if I am the beast I say I am. I wonder if I am as strong as I believe and if I have the ability to go the distance. Sometimes I wonder because it feels like I do it all on my own and I ask myself the hard questions.
Am I doing the right thing? Am I making things better or worse? Am I responsible for the position I am in and do I keep digging myself in and out and in and out of the same holes?
But those moments of uncertainty never last. They show up and hang around long enough for me to say hi and then I pick my silly ass up and start exercising. When the sweat starts pouring down my head and the heart starts racing a little I get this surge of adrenaline and I feel like I am back. Ready to battle and I remember I am built for the long haul and am capable of doing what is required.
When I close my eyes I see you standing there. When I think about the future you're in it. Whatever this thing is between us it doesn't feel like something that is limited or bound by conventional structure. I never think of it as anything but two people who given the chance will bring out the best. There is more depth and more trust.
My guess is if push came to shove and we had to tell people who are best friend was and weren't holding back we'd say each other.
I refuse to just bury and ignore that. I tried and it made me a bit crazier than normal.
Don't get me wrong, I can do whatever I have to. I can walk through this world on my own. I can figure everything out but someone used to tell me to get my head out of my ass and I did. Took a while, but I did it. You can tell me all you want about bad circumstances, timing, windows and whatever else but that doesn't change feelings.
Doesn't change this overwhelming sense that when we kiss you are there. Doesn't change that ache that is always there when you are not. Doesn't change that I want to sit with you on our couch and just talk about our day or life. Doesn't change the joy of just spending time with you.
My heart is still yours.
You don't have to respond or say anything to this. I am not asking you to make any promises or do anything. Just wanted to share it with you. Makes me feel better and I hope it does the same for you. Gah, woman, sometimes you just kill me. ;)
I suppose you can consider this one of those notes where I don't hold back and just let go. One of those moments where I don't try to protect your heart or mine, where I just write and rely upon faith. Might sound ridiculous to you but sometimes it is all I have got.
Baby, sometimes I wonder if I am the beast I say I am. I wonder if I am as strong as I believe and if I have the ability to go the distance. Sometimes I wonder because it feels like I do it all on my own and I ask myself the hard questions.
Am I doing the right thing? Am I making things better or worse? Am I responsible for the position I am in and do I keep digging myself in and out and in and out of the same holes?
But those moments of uncertainty never last. They show up and hang around long enough for me to say hi and then I pick my silly ass up and start exercising. When the sweat starts pouring down my head and the heart starts racing a little I get this surge of adrenaline and I feel like I am back. Ready to battle and I remember I am built for the long haul and am capable of doing what is required.
When I close my eyes I see you standing there. When I think about the future you're in it. Whatever this thing is between us it doesn't feel like something that is limited or bound by conventional structure. I never think of it as anything but two people who given the chance will bring out the best. There is more depth and more trust.
My guess is if push came to shove and we had to tell people who are best friend was and weren't holding back we'd say each other.
I refuse to just bury and ignore that. I tried and it made me a bit crazier than normal.
Don't get me wrong, I can do whatever I have to. I can walk through this world on my own. I can figure everything out but someone used to tell me to get my head out of my ass and I did. Took a while, but I did it. You can tell me all you want about bad circumstances, timing, windows and whatever else but that doesn't change feelings.
Doesn't change this overwhelming sense that when we kiss you are there. Doesn't change that ache that is always there when you are not. Doesn't change that I want to sit with you on our couch and just talk about our day or life. Doesn't change the joy of just spending time with you.
My heart is still yours.
You don't have to respond or say anything to this. I am not asking you to make any promises or do anything. Just wanted to share it with you. Makes me feel better and I hope it does the same for you. Gah, woman, sometimes you just kill me. ;)
Plans
Dear Juneleh,
How is my birthday girl doing? If you asked me if I had plans for how to celebrate I would say yes. If you asked me if I had more than one set I would say yes again. If you asked me to tell you about them I might say maybe.
That is because I plan on celebrating with you again one day and I don't want to wreck all of the surprises. Got to keep a few for days to come. For now know that I am thinking about you and hope your day is awesome.
How is my birthday girl doing? If you asked me if I had plans for how to celebrate I would say yes. If you asked me if I had more than one set I would say yes again. If you asked me to tell you about them I might say maybe.
That is because I plan on celebrating with you again one day and I don't want to wreck all of the surprises. Got to keep a few for days to come. For now know that I am thinking about you and hope your day is awesome.
Always liked These
"Come live with me and be my love,
And we will all the pleasures prove
That valleys, groves, hills, and fields,
Woods, or steepy mountain yields.
And we will all the pleasures prove
That valleys, groves, hills, and fields,
Woods, or steepy mountain yields.
And we will sit upon rocks,
Seeing the shepherds feed their flocks,
By shallow rivers to whose falls
Melodious birds sing madrigals.
Seeing the shepherds feed their flocks,
By shallow rivers to whose falls
Melodious birds sing madrigals.
And I will make thee beds of roses
And a thousand fragrant poises,
A cap of flowers, and a kirtle
Embroidered all with leaves of myrtle;"
And a thousand fragrant poises,
A cap of flowers, and a kirtle
Embroidered all with leaves of myrtle;"
The Passionate Shepherd To His Love- Christopher Marlowe
Nights in white satin, never reaching the end,
Letters I've written, never meaning to send.
Beauty I've always missed, with these eyes before.
Just what the truth is, I can't say anymore.
Nights In White Satin- The Moody Blues
Letters I've written, never meaning to send.
Beauty I've always missed, with these eyes before.
Just what the truth is, I can't say anymore.
Nights In White Satin- The Moody Blues
There are other verses deserving of time but I haven't any to give to them now. Still I abide one moment longer to share a long and linger longer for desire leads me hither. Head gives in to heart and hope springs eternal.
One hand, one breath, one moment.
Together.
