Hi Baby,
Stopped and got a pizza, heard this song and smiled. I think it is about Blake Shelton's brother but there was a time when I associated it with you.
Have you noticed that I can be persistent and determined about things and people that are important to me.
This computer issue is making me fucking nuts, but I am not going to buy one now unless I have no other choice. Sooner or later I'll start seriously thinking about what to buy.
You have a bit of a problem. You love me and I love you. It is only getting deeper and we are not just walking away because this time is different. But you haven't any thing to worry about either, we are smart people and we'll figure things out.
It is sort of a role reversal because last time I was the one who was more nervous and now I am not. I don't see any reason to be. We'll figure it out.
Want to know why I am sure we are going to sleep together? Cuz you love me and it is going to be something you want to do. It just will. We aren't phased by each other and we can't get enough time together. It makes a difference.
Think about how nice it sounds to just share a bed. Are you telling me that at some point it won't go beyond that. c'mon now woman, you'll be the one who makes all the moves and then you'll blame me.
Anyway, I'll stop this because you are texting me to send you something. But even though you pretend yuo don't like hearing it I will tell you I love you again and maybe if you are lucky I'll tell you what else is on my mind.
Visibility
One More
Dear June,
I am jammed for time now baby so I am not going to write much, but I'll try to come back later. Just want to let you know I am already having a ton of fun with you and looking very much to seeing you soon.
I am jammed for time now baby so I am not going to write much, but I'll try to come back later. Just want to let you know I am already having a ton of fun with you and looking very much to seeing you soon.
Three Times
Hi Darling,
I have been staring at the picture of you in that black dress that I like so much and thinking thoughts that I am not sure I should write about here. Been thinking about how I am going to pull you into my arms and hold you. Been thinking about how I am going to run my fingers through your hair and bury my nose in your neck.
Been thinking about how I am going to run my hands all over your body and how I am going to take you away to the special place we have always had. Been thinking about when we we are spooning I am going to press my whole body up against yours and tell you a story.
Been thinking about how I am going to roll you onto your back and climb on top of you and how you'll wrap your legs around me and the conversation we'll have. Because no one has ever been closer than us and we are right on the verge of it all.
Been thinking about how happy we make each other and how badly I just want to kiss your lips. Been thinking about what it was like to kiss and make love to you. Been thinking about how we just get each other and how you'll give me your neck. Been thinking about it is like time stands still when I am with you. Been thinking about how I am going to rub that sexy ass.
Been thinking about how I just want to make you smile and feel safe. About how I want you to just let go and let it all out. I will kiss the tears away now as I have always said I would. Been thinking about moments in time and how much we have shared and been through.
Been thinking about it felt to have you shudder in my arms and how safe we make each other feel. Ten years later and here we are in the most incredible circumstances. Been thinking about how it would only take one push and we would be joined together again and about how badly I want your mouth.
Holding your hand sends a charge up my spine. It sounds silly, but it is true. Been thinking about how confident I am that I can take you somewhere you haven't been and it is all based upon the trust. It is because we are friends that it happens.
I have been staring at the picture of you in that black dress that I like so much and thinking thoughts that I am not sure I should write about here. Been thinking about how I am going to pull you into my arms and hold you. Been thinking about how I am going to run my fingers through your hair and bury my nose in your neck.
Been thinking about how I am going to run my hands all over your body and how I am going to take you away to the special place we have always had. Been thinking about when we we are spooning I am going to press my whole body up against yours and tell you a story.
Been thinking about how I am going to roll you onto your back and climb on top of you and how you'll wrap your legs around me and the conversation we'll have. Because no one has ever been closer than us and we are right on the verge of it all.
Been thinking about how happy we make each other and how badly I just want to kiss your lips. Been thinking about what it was like to kiss and make love to you. Been thinking about how we just get each other and how you'll give me your neck. Been thinking about it is like time stands still when I am with you. Been thinking about how I am going to rub that sexy ass.
Been thinking about how I just want to make you smile and feel safe. About how I want you to just let go and let it all out. I will kiss the tears away now as I have always said I would. Been thinking about moments in time and how much we have shared and been through.
Been thinking about it felt to have you shudder in my arms and how safe we make each other feel. Ten years later and here we are in the most incredible circumstances. Been thinking about how it would only take one push and we would be joined together again and about how badly I want your mouth.
Holding your hand sends a charge up my spine. It sounds silly, but it is true. Been thinking about how confident I am that I can take you somewhere you haven't been and it is all based upon the trust. It is because we are friends that it happens.
Hump Day
In a few minutes you'll see my text about not writing any more tonight and then you'll try not to pout. But you'll come here and find a note from me and smile. I don't know what I am going to write about here because I am just writing some of the thoughts in my head,
I could write more explicitly about what I see and what I think. I could tell you that if we get to spend the entire night together I have a few ideas about what we will do but I am going to spell any of that out. You can either guess or ask and even then I don't know.
But spooning with you really does sound good and if I am being perfectly candid at some point I want your legs wrapped around me, don't care if you are dressed, just want to be close. I see so many images in my mind and have a million thoughts but some will have to wait.
Happy Hump Day.
I could write more explicitly about what I see and what I think. I could tell you that if we get to spend the entire night together I have a few ideas about what we will do but I am going to spell any of that out. You can either guess or ask and even then I don't know.
But spooning with you really does sound good and if I am being perfectly candid at some point I want your legs wrapped around me, don't care if you are dressed, just want to be close. I see so many images in my mind and have a million thoughts but some will have to wait.
Happy Hump Day.
Junester
Dear Junie Junester,
You crack me up sometimes. I know my girl wants love letters but doesn't want to come out and say it. That is not code for what I want either, it is what I think you want.
I do know things about you. Many of them are things you have told me and some are things I observe but so much is just based upon what I feel/sense. It is sort of a cool but kind of odd way to be.
I am amazed by you in many areas. Yeah, I know that is not specific but I like making you think. Speaking of that you may think all I want to is ravish your body but that isn't it. Your mind and your heart catch me as they always have.
Can't wait to take a nap with you. The thought of spooning and holding you in my arms makes me smile. It feels good to have my pal back.
You crack me up sometimes. I know my girl wants love letters but doesn't want to come out and say it. That is not code for what I want either, it is what I think you want.
I do know things about you. Many of them are things you have told me and some are things I observe but so much is just based upon what I feel/sense. It is sort of a cool but kind of odd way to be.
I am amazed by you in many areas. Yeah, I know that is not specific but I like making you think. Speaking of that you may think all I want to is ravish your body but that isn't it. Your mind and your heart catch me as they always have.
Can't wait to take a nap with you. The thought of spooning and holding you in my arms makes me smile. It feels good to have my pal back.
Sex and Love
Dear June,
My sweet girl. It is evening and I am sitting here covered in sweat and waiting for you to go eat dinner so that I can go work out.
So this occurs to me
We talk about work. We talk about life. We talk about docs, aging, glasses and more. And we dig a bit into us because we are reconnecting and aren't quite sure how to do it. There is a feeling that no time has passed and yet a million years have passed.
You'll read this twice and every time I write that I don't just love you, I fucking love you the smile on your face will get a bit broader.
And you'll ask yourself all the same questions about why I feel this way about you. So I'll wonder for a moment if there is something else I should know and then decide I don't really care because even though I like knowing everything about you it is ok if there is a gap here and there.
I'll move on past that because like I said we make each other happy and as goofy as it sounds I feel like we really are healing each other. We both feel like we look like hell right now and maybe we do. Maybe we don't come close to looking the way we want but it hasn't ever been about that.
Remember a million years ago when I said I just wanted to be inside you so that we could talk, well that is a big part of everything. I like being close and connected with you.
When you go a million years carrying the load by yourself you learn to go numb and then when you start to realize you don't have to it is hard to contain. I made a major move as you know and I am glad I did for a million reasons (yeah, I keep saying million) but most of them were based on life without you.
So when I think about everything I have as clear a conscience as I can have given the circumstances. It may not be perfect but life never is.
And I am far more focused on holding my best friend in my arms because it is what I want and need. We shouldn't go through life using objects to satisfy ourselves. We deserve better. You deserve better. You don't have to punish yourself.
You know I am a seeker and that I spend a ton of time thinking about life and what happens, but I don't do it with you in that way. I just let my heart take the lead.
I really do think we'll fall deeper this time and I am going to try and stop it. I am going to just ride this wave and see what happens because two people who have been through hell and hit low points they wondered if they would ever get out have found a way to feel the sunshine on their back again.
Right now I am perfectly happy with your loving me and being my friend. If other stuff comes than it comes and if it doesn't well that is ok because that is just how it is.
My sweet girl. It is evening and I am sitting here covered in sweat and waiting for you to go eat dinner so that I can go work out.
So this occurs to me
Harry Burns: The first time we met, we hated each other.
Sally Albright: No, you didn't hate me, I hated you. The second time we met, you didn't even remember me.
Harry Burns: I did too, I remembered you. The third time we met, we became friends.
Sally Albright: We were friends for a long time.
Harry Burns: And then we weren't.
Sally Albright: And then we fell in love.
[on sofa as last documentary couple]
Sally Albright: Three months later we got married.
Harry Burns: Yeah, it only took three months.
Sally Albright: Twelve years and three months.
Harry Burns: We had this - we had a really wonderful wedding.
Sally Albright: It was - it really was a
[laugh]
Sally Albright: beautiful wedding.
Harry Burns: [overlapping] It was great. We had this enormous coconut cake.
Sally Albright: Huge coconut cake with a - with a - tiers and there was this very rich chocolate sauce on the side.
Harry Burns: Right, cause not everybody likes it on the cake, cause it makes it very soggy.
Sally Albright: Particularly the coconut soaks up a lot of excess and you really - it's important to keep it on the side.
Harry Burns: Right.
I am feeling a bit crazed right now for a million different reasons none of which have to do with you. I think it is kind of funny that you keep telling me that all I do is talk about riding you all night long because we talk about a million other things.We talk about work. We talk about life. We talk about docs, aging, glasses and more. And we dig a bit into us because we are reconnecting and aren't quite sure how to do it. There is a feeling that no time has passed and yet a million years have passed.
You'll read this twice and every time I write that I don't just love you, I fucking love you the smile on your face will get a bit broader.
And you'll ask yourself all the same questions about why I feel this way about you. So I'll wonder for a moment if there is something else I should know and then decide I don't really care because even though I like knowing everything about you it is ok if there is a gap here and there.
I'll move on past that because like I said we make each other happy and as goofy as it sounds I feel like we really are healing each other. We both feel like we look like hell right now and maybe we do. Maybe we don't come close to looking the way we want but it hasn't ever been about that.
Remember a million years ago when I said I just wanted to be inside you so that we could talk, well that is a big part of everything. I like being close and connected with you.
When you go a million years carrying the load by yourself you learn to go numb and then when you start to realize you don't have to it is hard to contain. I made a major move as you know and I am glad I did for a million reasons (yeah, I keep saying million) but most of them were based on life without you.
So when I think about everything I have as clear a conscience as I can have given the circumstances. It may not be perfect but life never is.
And I am far more focused on holding my best friend in my arms because it is what I want and need. We shouldn't go through life using objects to satisfy ourselves. We deserve better. You deserve better. You don't have to punish yourself.
You know I am a seeker and that I spend a ton of time thinking about life and what happens, but I don't do it with you in that way. I just let my heart take the lead.
I really do think we'll fall deeper this time and I am going to try and stop it. I am going to just ride this wave and see what happens because two people who have been through hell and hit low points they wondered if they would ever get out have found a way to feel the sunshine on their back again.
Right now I am perfectly happy with your loving me and being my friend. If other stuff comes than it comes and if it doesn't well that is ok because that is just how it is.
Happy
Good morning June,
7 AM and I am dashing off some quick unedited thoughts.
Listening to Springsteen sing Happy now and it seems appropriate. Thought about how you described yourself as just passing through the days and how sad that sounds.
Life is too short to just pass through. Things are hard sometimes, life gets rough and our job isn't always to ask how or why that is. Sometimes it is just to manage the days but we are also given the gift of finding the people that help us keep from drowning.
It won't always make sense or be obvious who they are and why it goes that way. But when you find them and realize you have them you have hold on because only fools throw that away.
We all have our baggage and crap we carry from the past and while we can't always ignore it we don't always have to let it dictate how the future goes. Sometimes you accept a gift and move ahead.
Stop asking me why I like you so much as if it is such a surprise. You deserve good things as much as the next person.
I like you and I love you and not just because I want to connect with you on the deepest possible levels. That astrology is right, I am convinced we are going to help heal each other. Don't know what the future holds and don't care, just like the smile in your voice and the knowing that you these posts I write you weren't all for naught.
The bond is getting deeper and though some things are much harder, more complicated I suspect things will be better this time around and that we may find ourselves falling deeper in love than ever before.
7 AM and I am dashing off some quick unedited thoughts.
Listening to Springsteen sing Happy now and it seems appropriate. Thought about how you described yourself as just passing through the days and how sad that sounds.
Life is too short to just pass through. Things are hard sometimes, life gets rough and our job isn't always to ask how or why that is. Sometimes it is just to manage the days but we are also given the gift of finding the people that help us keep from drowning.
It won't always make sense or be obvious who they are and why it goes that way. But when you find them and realize you have them you have hold on because only fools throw that away.
We all have our baggage and crap we carry from the past and while we can't always ignore it we don't always have to let it dictate how the future goes. Sometimes you accept a gift and move ahead.
Stop asking me why I like you so much as if it is such a surprise. You deserve good things as much as the next person.
I like you and I love you and not just because I want to connect with you on the deepest possible levels. That astrology is right, I am convinced we are going to help heal each other. Don't know what the future holds and don't care, just like the smile in your voice and the knowing that you these posts I write you weren't all for naught.
The bond is getting deeper and though some things are much harder, more complicated I suspect things will be better this time around and that we may find ourselves falling deeper in love than ever before.
Falling In Love...Again
Dear Juneleh,
Baby when you ask if I love you I am tempted to not respond because I think you know the answer. But I know you like hearing it as much as I do.
I love you. I do and not because of any one singular thing.
This post is tied into the idea I had.
There was a moment when we were texting this weekend where I had this thought, "we are falling in love again."
Now maybe that is nonsense. Maybe it is bullshit, hope or something other but I just don't think so. That is because those damn bells I talk about keep telling me that we are happier now than we were.
We don't just love each other, we like each other.
I understand your concerns. I understand your feelings and in many ways mine aren't much different. I did not like myself very much these last few years for a variety of reasons so simple makes me smile. Simple makes me jump up and down and wag my tail.
But I also have decided that after I ended up working/living in one of the last places I ever expected to that I need to just roll with things.
And when I look at us because it is "us" I don't sit wonder and worry about whether I am going to have to figure out what do about it. I don't worry about whether we'll be good friends, lovers or an old married couple.
I just smile and enjoy because more than anything else that is what I want now. I want to just have that one person I trust and can lean on with anything. To me that is simple and all the rest is commentary.
Baby when you ask if I love you I am tempted to not respond because I think you know the answer. But I know you like hearing it as much as I do.
I love you. I do and not because of any one singular thing.
This post is tied into the idea I had.
There was a moment when we were texting this weekend where I had this thought, "we are falling in love again."
Now maybe that is nonsense. Maybe it is bullshit, hope or something other but I just don't think so. That is because those damn bells I talk about keep telling me that we are happier now than we were.
We don't just love each other, we like each other.
I understand your concerns. I understand your feelings and in many ways mine aren't much different. I did not like myself very much these last few years for a variety of reasons so simple makes me smile. Simple makes me jump up and down and wag my tail.
But I also have decided that after I ended up working/living in one of the last places I ever expected to that I need to just roll with things.
And when I look at us because it is "us" I don't sit wonder and worry about whether I am going to have to figure out what do about it. I don't worry about whether we'll be good friends, lovers or an old married couple.
I just smile and enjoy because more than anything else that is what I want now. I want to just have that one person I trust and can lean on with anything. To me that is simple and all the rest is commentary.
Words I Want To Say
Dear June,
I know it sounds goofy, but as I started writing this I heard the bells go off and there was a text from you. The phone's notifications are turned off so I didn't actually hear anything just knew to look down at the phone.
This will be short.
I am exceedingly grateful that we are talking again and an active part of each others lives. I am not intentionally trying to talk in circles around you. I know you like details. I am just taking a slower pace because I don't want you to feel overwhelmed by any of this.
I am good. I am happy. I am frustrated by some things but it is nothing that I am surprised by.
I love that you want to know more and want to help. You are. You help me more than you know. I have spent years feeling like I was taking care of things by myself and I could continue on that path.
I am glad I am not. I am glad you are in my life and I hope you never leave it.
Just taking my time now to let things unfold and to take care of you. You asked for simple so I am giving it to you.
If you ask what my gut says it says all is good. We still have this exceptional bond. Can't wait to see you again, so much easier to talk in person and faster. Easier to answer your six thousand questions.
-J
I know it sounds goofy, but as I started writing this I heard the bells go off and there was a text from you. The phone's notifications are turned off so I didn't actually hear anything just knew to look down at the phone.
This will be short.
I am exceedingly grateful that we are talking again and an active part of each others lives. I am not intentionally trying to talk in circles around you. I know you like details. I am just taking a slower pace because I don't want you to feel overwhelmed by any of this.
I am good. I am happy. I am frustrated by some things but it is nothing that I am surprised by.
I love that you want to know more and want to help. You are. You help me more than you know. I have spent years feeling like I was taking care of things by myself and I could continue on that path.
I am glad I am not. I am glad you are in my life and I hope you never leave it.
Just taking my time now to let things unfold and to take care of you. You asked for simple so I am giving it to you.
If you ask what my gut says it says all is good. We still have this exceptional bond. Can't wait to see you again, so much easier to talk in person and faster. Easier to answer your six thousand questions.
-J
Your Hips Part II
Dear Sweet Juneleh,
Since you are back here in our own world I am going to tell you again I want to grab your hips and pull you towards me.
I love teasing you more than you know. It is all sorts of fun I would follow up on the conversation about whether you are fun to ride and reliable but you might take it the wrong way and I wouldn't want to ride you about that.
Damn, did I just say something about riding you again.
Bad Johnny, bad Johnny.
;)
Hope you are enjoying your day. Been working here, going to see a movie and coming back to work again. I am sure you will check in with me because you can't get enough bananas.
;)
Someone thinks you are kind of nifty sometimes.
Since you are back here in our own world I am going to tell you again I want to grab your hips and pull you towards me.
I love teasing you more than you know. It is all sorts of fun I would follow up on the conversation about whether you are fun to ride and reliable but you might take it the wrong way and I wouldn't want to ride you about that.
Damn, did I just say something about riding you again.
Bad Johnny, bad Johnny.
;)
Hope you are enjoying your day. Been working here, going to see a movie and coming back to work again. I am sure you will check in with me because you can't get enough bananas.
;)
Someone thinks you are kind of nifty sometimes.
Your Hips
Dear sweet Juneleh,
Since this is not the g-rated post I am going to tell you about how I am going to grab your hips and pull you into me.
And even thought you'll stiffen up you won't immediately pull away because you like knowing that old John thinks you are fucking sexy and that he wants to do nothing more than ravish your body and make you submit.
I have a few tricks up my sleeve that I haven't shared with you yet. Just you wait. Or maybe I should be saying that to myself because I have been waiting for a while, but it might be worth it.
Yeah, I just wrote might. You don't have to read it twice. So much fun to tease you. ;)
Since this is not the g-rated post I am going to tell you about how I am going to grab your hips and pull you into me.
And even thought you'll stiffen up you won't immediately pull away because you like knowing that old John thinks you are fucking sexy and that he wants to do nothing more than ravish your body and make you submit.
I have a few tricks up my sleeve that I haven't shared with you yet. Just you wait. Or maybe I should be saying that to myself because I have been waiting for a while, but it might be worth it.
Yeah, I just wrote might. You don't have to read it twice. So much fun to tease you. ;)
